10 Things to get done before 30

1. Publish a book: whether it is my" memoir so far" or my collection of sex chronicles. 
2. Cross Country Road Trip: Pack up for three weeks and see the sites of the nation. Either in an RV or a rental car.
3. Passion Parties: Done my way. No cut and dry script or set packages. Me being a hostess, knowing what i'm doing, what i'm talking about, and socializing these women to get the pleasure they deserve from sex. 
4. Get Healthy: Not just lose weight, but get better eating patterns and a regular exercise routine.
5. Love: Not sex or getting married or anything unrealistic like that, but love myself, be open to accepting love and giving love to others.
6. Travel to Exotic Places: Places that I have never been, places I want to explore fully and places I can rediscover culture.
7. Move Out of LA: For a while, like a year or so. These are a few places i'm considering, New York, San Francisco, New Orleans, Atlanta, and Houston.
8. Learn a new language: become as fluent as possible and travel to the country of origin to experience it fully.
9. Volunteer: mentor program, soup kitchen, sexual abuse counseling, or some other variety.
10. Date: demand better from my suitors and offer more as a woman. 

Can I Just Say....

• If you know more about reality shows and celebrity gossip than you do current events, we might need to re-evaluate our friendship.
• When you think its cute to be ratchet and be on the guest list at every "Hollywood" event instead of taking care of your children, we don't have anything to talk about.
• Blaming ALL of your issues on the actions of others instead of taking responsibility for it yourself, you might need to re-evaluate your life.
• If you would rather smoke a bowl/blunt than be on time for anything you are part of whats wrong with society
• When the only time you want to make changes in your life are at the end and beginning of the year, you're just sad, because change can happen at any time in the pursuit of growth.

These are just a few of my rantings, that have really been weighing on my heart. So much foolishness I see, and it's just bothering me.

Adrenaline Junkie

Adrenaline pulsing through my body, all I want is your body on top of mine with you deep inside me. Tasting every inch of your sweaty chest as you thrust deep within my pussy walls. I bite you, and I grip my freshly manicured nails into your back. You let out a manly grunt and dig deeper inside me. I release a moan of ecstasy as you have reached a pleasure unknown to me before. I can't hold back the screams of deep penetration. When I climax my body quakes and my legs shiver. I am utterly satisfied and yet my body is glutton for more of you. You slide out of me making me quiver and shake with the slow anticipation of you thrusting back in me. After you leave my body I wrap my legs around your ankles so that I may grip your hard dick around my lips and deep down my throat. Surprised by my actions you grip my sheets and curl your toes. Popping up and grabbing my hair, I slide you down my throat and when I come up I grab your shaft and begin stroking. Up and down in a smooth motion with a twist at the top I grip it a little tighter. With your dick so hard I can feel the veins throbbing ready to blow so I stop and climb on top of you. I want to feel you explode inside me. So as I slide down on top of you I can feel you release against my walls and cream on the lips of my pussy as I pop up off your dick. I collapse on the bed next to you staring at the ceiling as I listen to your heart beat and relax in perfect unison, thinking about the next time we meet for some adrenaline.

So what's on the table?

Well let me start by saying going through therapy wasn't easy, dealing with my past trauma and relationship baggage. When I started healing, I knew things would be alright. So let me get back to the title of this post, What's on the table? I had a long conversation with one of my friends whose opinion I trust. I told her children are still not on the table, but me being open to the idea of marriage is there. So if I find someone that wants to marry me as much as I want to marry them, we can maybe make this happen. Just wanted to put that good juu-juu out there. I am no longer running from love and true happiness with a companion. My wise friend told me that no matter if you are married or not, everyone needs a lifelong companion. Truer words were never spoken.

Show Me What You Mean

Love me like the girls you look at when we're together.

Give me attention like you give your boys when we kick it.

Cherish our time together when I'm not fucking your brains out.

Want me the way I wanted you in the  beginning. 

I guess that's too much to ask from a man that thinks he's too good for me.

I guess it too easy to get lost in craziness that is life.

I guess I wasn't worth the extra effort.

Be the man that your momma raised you to be.

Be the man that your father taught life lessons to

Be the man that your parents showed how to love, not how your boys conditioned you to.