I Love Me

I feel like people expect me to be insecure about myself based on my size, race, ethnicity, intelligence or emotional well being. My biggest and only fear is failure. So trying to shake my confidence because you're unhappy with you is sad and just plain pathetic. I may have average tendencies but my life has been far from that. I know I'm am not the greatest there ever was, because I'm still learning, but I'm damn good at whatever I set my mind to.

It wasn't true love..

I would still feel something for you now if it was. We talked for 5 years and said I love you more than once. We never slept together, hell we never even went out. The first 2 years I knew you, I was in Hawaii, which made everything my fault. I'll take the hit for that. The next 3 years I was practically down the street, yet you couldn't make time for me. So what about our connection speaks on love. I cared for you in a way that was new to me. We grew in a way that showed personal growth, but not in coming together. Our conversation was immaculate and truly something I will miss, however my passion for you has long since left the building. I want nothing to do with you. I don't care if you think of me at night, I don't care if you are concerned because of something you heard, I don't want any contact from you. I don't hit you up, I don't call or text, I didn't even add you when you requested me on Instagram. It will only hurt you more and irritate me to no end that we even speak. Our story is over, and my time for you is done. I have closed the book and moved on to someone that wants me in their life not just when it's convenient.

Sex me...

I masturbate to the thought of you.
Illustrations running wild in my imagination,
giving me the sensation of your touch as I slide my panties down.
Arching my back as I picture your tongue parting my lips
I glide my finger over my clit and wonder what your lips feel like kissing it.

I masturbate to the thought of you.
Your voice narrating every move.
My body shaking in anticipation.
Your breath on my neck soothing my quivers
I puddle up as I finger inside my pussy.

I masturbate to the thought of you.
I masturbate to the thought of you.
I masturbate to the thought of you.

You are my fantasy, my escape, my deepest desire.
Giving me more to think about with every
Conversation
Encounter
Experience.

What I want from my man...

Love me like the lines in my favorite love poem.
Protect me like a pit bull caring for its loved ones
Fuck me like its the last time we can ever be together.
Hold me like a fresh blanket of snow on a mountain peak

Be the man I have seen in your heart.
Be the man I have grown to care about.
Be the man you have shown me.

I will be the woman that cares for you.
I will be the woman you need me to be.
I will be the woman you've see in your heart.

Sea breeze

He gently caresses my cheek to brush single strands of hair out of my face.
Deeply gazing into my eyes,
He grabs hold of me.
Locking his lips on mine
This embrace could last forever.
I don't want him to ever let me go.
Passion fills my heart,
And lust fills my body
I want you to ravage me.
Take hold of my body
Take control of me
I give myself to you in the purest of ways
That turns to the dirtiest actions.

What's wrong with me?

Just simply that question. What's wrong with me, that I can't get the outcome I desire, the love I want, and the work I know I can handle. When is it my time to shine? Am I just not patient enough, am I not working hard enough, is my heart not vulnerable enough? WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH ME?

I don't know if I know what real love is...but i'm willing to try...

When it comes to love, we accept what we think we deserve. Rarely do we feel that we deserve love, yet so common, love is what is most desired. Not feeling worthy or feeling like we have been too hurt or are too damaged for another to love us.

"I've never had someone love me the way I wanted, only what I felt I deserved"

 I don't know if what I thought was love was really love, but I do know the relationship I'm developing now feels different than anything I have developed before. So maybe happiness is right around the corner as long as I am willing to try and he is willing to trust me.

What are we?

Nothing about our meeting was traditional, but I'm glad we did. Nothing about our personalities is traditional, but I love that. We go through the motions of talking, keeping one another in the loop of the daily grind. But are we building? This is the glaring thought that crosses my mind when I'm not thinking of the happy moments we have shared. Am I the chick you text and sext, am I the chick you fuck on occasion, am I just a friend with the benefits of getting your dick wet and my pussy soaked. Who am I to you? If anyone asked me if I was single I would tell them no, but that's because I'm not speaking to anyone else romantically and in my mind we are romanticized. Am I wrong though? Do you want me to yourself or does it matter? I feel at times that I talk myself out of working through the emotions of a real relationship based on the actions that may or may not be there. I can't talk myself into one, but apparently have no problem talking myself out of one. I want this, but I don't want to go it alone. So how do I ask, without being that girl? What are we?

My hunnie...

When he called me miss frank for the first time, something about it just said "yes!!!"...it didn't hit me till later a boy I no longer have in my life used to call me that...it was okay though...It didn't take away from the fact that I want him to keep calling me that. When I hear his voice it sends chills down my spine, I want to hear him all the time; Whether he is whispering in my ear, cracking jokes, or just saying my name, I am so glad he keeps speaking. UGH...I miss him so much...lol sorry y'all I have a little frustration building up!

Taking a little time..

While I am away for the summer, I will be posting significantly less, next to none. While I'm sure I will flood these pages with posts when I return, for the next four weeks, I will probably do a check in here and there but no serious posts. To my loyal followers, Thank you! I will see you lovely people in August

Love Always

Dymond Diva

My heart yearns for more...

Dreaming of a happier tomorrow and a happier you with a happier me.
You make me happy
Point
Blank
Period
I am a strong woman, and my words can cut
Listen to my actions
If I ain't left yet
I'm not going anywhere.
Know that my words speak volumes
bound together by my movements.
If I want you, I will take the effort to keep you.
Tell me how to be here for you, and I'll do it.
My heart is tired of being broken,
So help me keep the pieces mended.
My heart yearns for more,
So be what I need,
And I'll be there for you.