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Nothing but Love 2k15

It took me a long time to realize he didn't deserve my love. year after year, I went back to him and let him in my world. He would be mad if I said he never loved me, but it's true. He was in love with the made up life we dreamed together. He never loved me in my entirety. He wasn't down for my emotional health, he was down to talk about what could be. He wasn't down for my need of consistency, he was down with coming around when he needed me. I constantly side stepped and walked on eggshells to make sure I wouldn't make him mad at me for feeling how I felt. Now that he's out of my life for good, it feels good to not care about how my words will affect him. His feelings, and opinions about me don't matter anymore. So yeah it took me a long time to realize he wasn't the man for me, and that I deserved someone that wanted me, not just the idea of me. I shed a lot of tears for him and a few others in 2014, but those tears will nourish the seeds I planted for the coming year. Investing in me, and staying away from toxic people, relationships and more.

Wife Em Up!

I haven't had my cookies dipped in a while. My best friend has noticed the difference in me. Not in a bad way, but in a way of growth. I am realizing more about myself. I want to get laid, but not by any dude. Not by someone from the old roster, or a repeat backslide like I used to do. Don't get me wrong the struggle is real, and I want to slip and slide to my worst one, but I've been loving me for too long to let the physical want outweigh the emotional need for a better connection. I am always me, and very comfortable in my sensual sexual nature, but I want more. I don't want a boyfriend, I want a husband. I want a partner, a supporter, a best friend that will love me till the end of time. I'm ready to be the partner a good man needs, the wife, woman, and mother of his kids. His best friend, his confidant, chef, personal cheerleader, therapist, and nurse when he needs it. I don't trust the men of this generation to treat me the way I would treat them, because they have yet to prove to me that they can do that. So when I say these men ain't real, they ain't loyal, they not it, I don't mean all of them, the ones that I have encountered in any respect so far. I know there is quality out there, but I've been too wrapped up in past bullshit to look for what I know I'm worthy of receiving. I'm ready to be a wife, not a long term girlfriend, casual hook-up, or a repeat/redo.

Changing the World, One Word at a Time! | The Queen Latifah Show