Decoding the lies

Do you hear some these on the regular? If you do, you may be getting lied to. So next time you hear it say "why you lying?"

Men- "I'm scared to love because I was hurt before"
       -I want to see how much ass I can get from you before you wise up and leave me
Women- "We used to date, but he's just my friend now"
       -If you can't put the dick down this dude will be there to handle it.
Men- "I thought you trusted me"
       -I'm going to cheat on you, i just don't want you going through my phone to figure it out
Women-"I don't usually do this"
      -I don't want you to think i'm a hoe after this
Men- "Your friend is just mad at what we have"
      -I tried to fuck her, but she turned me down
Women- "Yes this is my hair"
      -I paid for it so it's mine
Men- "I wasn't looking at her booty"
      -I was i just didn't think you could see me do it
Women- "You're the father of litte Ja'kwame"
      -You may not be but you make the most money so i'm telling you its you
Men- "I don't like the way condoms feel"
      -I'm broke so i can't go buy some condoms. I just want to fuck and leave.
Women- "I don't do that"
      -I do, i just don't like you enough to do it for you
Men- "I just want you to be happy even if its not with me"
      -I want you to be happy only if its with me. I want you to think i'm sweet and sincere to get you back.
Women- "I've only slept with 3 guys"
      -Its way more than that, I just don't want you to call me a hoe
Men- "Let me call you right back"
      -I'm either just trying to get off the phone to holla at "shawty" or i'll forget to call back when i'm not busy
Women- "I would love a man for his heart not his money"
      -I don't want people to think i'm shallow but i really couldn't be with a broke man
Men- "Baby, i've been applying a lot of places, but nobody wants to hire me"
      -I'm telling you this so I can get some pussy tonight, and so you keep supporting my lazy.
Women- "I don't need a man for anything..."
      -He fucked my best friend and now i'm gonna be bitter and alone so I don't have to get hurt again
Men- "I Love You"
      -Either they mean it or it means I want some pussy
Women- "It's not going to cost much"
      -I don't want to tell you how much it's really going to cost because you'll be mad

More to come later