Ya girl found a new "beau" if you will to start her year off on the right foot. I'm a little nervous about it, because I like him a lot. I haven't had butterflies like this since the boyfriend of all boyfriends that made me a little bitter towards black men. Now before you jump on my case about that statement, no this isn't some "Diary of a Mad Black Woman" ish I just look closer at the company I keep when black men are involved. So since then I have placed any new and existing men in my life into 4 different groups: Buddy, Booty, Bestie, BF/Potential. They don't get moved around, because that adds confusion to the mix and would break down the whole system. There are of course exceptions to this rule, and some that don't get categorized.
Buddy- a guy that gets placed here will never get the booty, he will be kept here in the anticipation of, without ever getting there. He may or may not know this, however if left with the impression or illusion he will, he will stay around longer. Buddies tend to have a higher turnover rate, they come and go, which is not a problem, because they come a dime a dozen. The are from all walks of life, artsy, thuggish, nerdy, etc. The buddy is a girlfriend replacement. when you don't feel like being around girls and the catty behavior your buddy is there with video games, sports or party hook-ups.
Booty- This is all this guy gets, I call him, he calls me, we work it out and make it happen. We don't hang out on the weekends, we casually speak about what happened last time and what we want to do in the future. If we run into each other in public, we will be cordial like giving a hug or kiss on the cheek, and the conversation is kept to a minimum especially since your friends and his friends may not know that you know each other. Booty has no opportunity to move to any other category. Once I get bored with them or the sex is whack they get dropped and I move on. I'm kind of cold towards guys in this category because it helps me to not get emotionally involved. They tend to get more invested in me and try to move out of this group when that happens I have to let them go.
Bestie- I hold these men closest to my heart, because they are basically family. They can have whatever they want and need. There is nothing sexual about our relationship, its a bond of friendship. They get me and I get them. They are the men that I know will beat up any fool that hurts me, and cherish the laughs and memories we build. We watch sports together, play video games together and they are the best wingmen a girl could ever ask for. They don't cock-block, because they know I will bring the bitches with my slick tongue and cool attitude.
BF/Potential- This guy gets star quality treatment. He is the guy I probably flirted with first. He makes me blush and giggle, not laugh. He makes me smile not cheese. He makes me want to love not just lust. We talk on the phone for what seems like short periods of time but is actually hours. There is a mutual sensual/sexual attraction along with the intellectual respect for each others mind. Goals are career based, with support from future spousal commitment. If you get placed in this category, and it doesn't work out, you can not remain to be put in another category. I am done with you If you aren't good enough to be my BF why would I keep you around as a friend. Think about that.
The only problem with this "amazing" (lol) system is guys not knowing their place. I don't mean for it to sound so harsh, but it is what it is. You should always know where you stand with someone, because nothing is worse than trying to explain to someone you're not friends this is just a sex thing or you will never get this so stop being a bug-a-boo. It can so easily turn into a bad situation no matter who you are dealing with, so you have to keep in mind no matter how close of friends you may be, dealing with the opposite sex is always tricky so be careful with emotions and egos.
Buddy- a guy that gets placed here will never get the booty, he will be kept here in the anticipation of, without ever getting there. He may or may not know this, however if left with the impression or illusion he will, he will stay around longer. Buddies tend to have a higher turnover rate, they come and go, which is not a problem, because they come a dime a dozen. The are from all walks of life, artsy, thuggish, nerdy, etc. The buddy is a girlfriend replacement. when you don't feel like being around girls and the catty behavior your buddy is there with video games, sports or party hook-ups.
Booty- This is all this guy gets, I call him, he calls me, we work it out and make it happen. We don't hang out on the weekends, we casually speak about what happened last time and what we want to do in the future. If we run into each other in public, we will be cordial like giving a hug or kiss on the cheek, and the conversation is kept to a minimum especially since your friends and his friends may not know that you know each other. Booty has no opportunity to move to any other category. Once I get bored with them or the sex is whack they get dropped and I move on. I'm kind of cold towards guys in this category because it helps me to not get emotionally involved. They tend to get more invested in me and try to move out of this group when that happens I have to let them go.
Bestie- I hold these men closest to my heart, because they are basically family. They can have whatever they want and need. There is nothing sexual about our relationship, its a bond of friendship. They get me and I get them. They are the men that I know will beat up any fool that hurts me, and cherish the laughs and memories we build. We watch sports together, play video games together and they are the best wingmen a girl could ever ask for. They don't cock-block, because they know I will bring the bitches with my slick tongue and cool attitude.
BF/Potential- This guy gets star quality treatment. He is the guy I probably flirted with first. He makes me blush and giggle, not laugh. He makes me smile not cheese. He makes me want to love not just lust. We talk on the phone for what seems like short periods of time but is actually hours. There is a mutual sensual/sexual attraction along with the intellectual respect for each others mind. Goals are career based, with support from future spousal commitment. If you get placed in this category, and it doesn't work out, you can not remain to be put in another category. I am done with you If you aren't good enough to be my BF why would I keep you around as a friend. Think about that.
The only problem with this "amazing" (lol) system is guys not knowing their place. I don't mean for it to sound so harsh, but it is what it is. You should always know where you stand with someone, because nothing is worse than trying to explain to someone you're not friends this is just a sex thing or you will never get this so stop being a bug-a-boo. It can so easily turn into a bad situation no matter who you are dealing with, so you have to keep in mind no matter how close of friends you may be, dealing with the opposite sex is always tricky so be careful with emotions and egos.
Who is this new man?
ReplyDeletelol i'm taking it slow with him he's a sweetheart that I might keep around longer than I usually do :-)
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