I let him fizzle out, but with swinging arms fighting till the last bubble popped. I enjoy the thought of couple life with him, but too long have I fought to keep what was never truly mine. Delusions of grandeur is what my mind was plagued with. I wanted him to be the one so badly I denied myself the reality of our faults. Love has mistakenly been thrown around for YEARS, and to this day I don't think either of us knows what it is. If we did, it would not have been used so casually for so long. Knowing the existence of someone special is very different from being in love with them. He still tries my strength with every phone call, text message, and blog comment. I don't think I could ever completely close the door and lock it to the idea of him, but my arms are weak from trying to keep it propped open. I told him good bye and and he came back, I said I can't but he is still there. I don't know what to do with him, but as much as he won't let go, I haven't either. We shall see what is to come. I guarantee if we ever casually run into each other things would be different from the words my mind speaks. We shall see what happens next.
Love always,
Dymond Diva
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