Boyfriend Application

Recently since I decided to take myself off the market, because guys are just acting "Brand New" now-a-days. Having done a lot of interviews this week for work, combined with one of my friends bringing this topic to my attention, I got to thinking. What if we had resumes for relationships? What would you want to know up front so as not to waste time? so I came up with a series of questions I would want to know the answer to before i potentially wasted my time getting to know somebody that wasn't boyfriend material. Thus my boyfriend application was born. I'm feeling like you should also have to bring in references of people that know the good and bad about you, three at most. All jokes aside, here it is:


Get to know you.

1)Full Name __________________

2)Nickname(s)______________________________

3)Age___

4)Height____

5)Race/Ethnicity_______________

6)Birthday___/___/____

7)Astrological sign________

8)Do you follow Astrology?

9)Do you have siblings?Brothers___ Sisters___

10)Are your parents still apart of your life?


Get to know your situation.

1) Did you go to college? if yes where and what did you study?

2) Do you have a job?

3) Do you have a car?

4) Do you live at home with your parents? if no do you have roommates or are you by yourself?

5) Do you have any children? (yes one on the way counts)

6) Do you play any sports?


Get to know you at random.

1) Do you hang out with a bunch of girls or a bunch guys?

2) What sports do you watch? if none please stop and do not continue.

3) Would you rather go out on the town or stay inside and watch TV?

4) Who do you look up to most?

5) What kind of movies do you like?

6) When faced with a problem do you whine or just handle it?

7) Are you stupid? (NO JOKE, Do you use common sense)

8) What is a typical Friday or Saturday night like?

9) What phone carrier do you have?

10) Can you cook? (I don't mean top ramen or easy mac.)


Get to know what you're looking for. (BE HONEST)

1) Are you looking for long term or short term ?

2) Are you looking to just get laid or for a commitment?

3) Physically:
a)Height____
b)Weight____
c)Hair preference? (ie. long, short, curly, straight, color etc.)
d)Boob size_____
e)Waist____
f)Hips____

4) What's a deal breaker? (ie. physically, mentally, emotionally)

5) Make-up or no make-up?

6) Girlie girl or one of the guys? explain your answer.

Essay/Short Answer

Describe to me why you should be my boyfriend?

What is the biggest goal you have in life as of yet?

Why did your last relationship not work out?

Feel free to fill this out and return within 5-7 business days, just joking. Of course this is stuff I would want to know questions can vary so much from person to person, and could be completely sexually based or completely intellectually based.

Fucking vs. Loving

Fucking: Anytime, anywhere, down for anything
Loving: At night after a romantic dinner and stroll on the beach

Fucking: In the back seat of your car in a fast food parking lot
Loving: At the cabin by the lake where you would go for summer vacation when you were younger

Fucking: The two of you in someone else's pool skinny dipping
Loving: In your jacuzzi after a long day at work

Fucking: What single people do
Loving: What married people do

Fucking: Threesomes are an option for fun to be had
Loving: Threesomes are a way to get different sex

Fucking: One night stands
Loving: Same person every night

Fucking: Condoms, birth control, and worry about pregnancy
Loving: hoping to have a baby

Fucking: A new adventure everytime
Loving: The same adventure on repeat

Fucking: Gives you oral everytime
Loving: Gives you oral on your birthday.

Fucking: Is selfish, get yours and get out
Loving: Is generous, worries about their partner getting theirs

Fucking: Hit and miss on quality
Loving: You already know what you're getting

Last one so I should probably make it crazy good...lol
Fucking: Will have you calling in sick for a couple days cause you can't walk right, and you're just a little too tired to do anything important
Loving: Will have you knocked out and get a good night sleep, refreshed to start the next morning with a healthy breakfast.

Hoe This...Hoe That...Part Deux

Is there a limit that on the number of past sexual partners your current mate has had? I was recently reading about this on twitter, where a few of my friends were going back and forth in debate that only a woman should be limited in the number of past sexual partners she can have. As I was reading this it got me thinking, because a lot of what they were talking about was brought up in my post "Hoe This...Hoe That...". Many of the women that commented in this debate said that there was an unfair double standard, because "men can be hoes too". A few of them agreed with the men because "women look down on other women who have had a lot of partners". Quite a few of my friends believed that if they were to limit someone, they feel it would be okay to be limited, which I respect a great deal. Some which I highly favor, said "it's the past I can't control what she did before me", "the past is the past, and as long as he doesn't bring diseases with him to the present then i have no problems", "no because that would eliminate more than half the male population". To me no matter how educated you are, if you find someone with a tainted past, its the past, that shouldn't negate the fact that they make you happy and have potential to be the greatest love of your life. I really feel you should look at the motives behind why they may have so many sexual partners. Yes there can be the fact they have "hoe-tendencies", but is it that they are a hoe, or have a uninhibited sexual appetite? Hoes will smash the homies, sexual people enjoy every aspect of sex, from the passion and lust to sensuality and tenderness. Some men will sleep with you, your roommate, your sister and your best friend without a second glance. Other men will look for a deeper connection to associate the passion they have have for and with you, which you probably don't share with those people. Some women feel the same way. Take me for example, I don't sleep with every guy that hits on me, its not my style, but I still get good sex on the regular and I have more partners than the average, does that make me a hoe? Most people would say yes, many others would say no, and guaranteed the ones that say yes are men, because of the way they are programmed to think. Brought about because of society, women with multiple partners, are tainted, but men with multiple partners are praised for their experience. A lot of women that fuck to get them something or somewhere in life, will fuck your best friend and your cousin, and have no self-respect these are the hoes you can't turn into housewives, because if someone comes around with a bigger bank account or a bigger dick they will be out the door. So many people are so narrow minded that they can't help but think and believe what the societal norm is. You have to look outside that people. Open your eyes, develop your own thought and stop perpetuating these double standards.

Hoe This....Hoe That...

Why is it a problem, that I don't have a boyfriend anymore, but have sex on the regular? Society has put so much negativity on women having sex out of marriage or a relationship, that most girls I know don't like to talk about it for fear of being called a slut or hoe. Yet on the other hand, its perfectly okay that young men "take down" as many females as they can. Guys almost get rewarded for their "sex game" being experienced.
I feel like i'm a catch. I am educated, with a degree in Corporate Communications, I cook, clean, and take care of my business. I work, still in school to further my education, I drive, and i'm saving up to buy my own house. So my biggest question is what's the problem? and don't give me some half-ass answer that guys are intimidated by me, because I think that's a lazy lame excuse for anyone to have on themselves.
It's almost as though I need to be a virgin for guys to think i'm wifey material. While guys get more and more praise for how many conquests he has in his youth before he settles down. It reminds me a lot of the show "Sex and the City". Samantha is constantly be looked down on by her neighbors, co-workers, and on occasion her friends. They end up coming across a man, that is just as known for his promiscuity, yet it's okay with everyone, because "its what men do".
If you've seen the show, I wouldn't call myself a "Samantha", but I do enjoy my regular sexcapades. does my promiscuity negate my "wife qualities"? I feel I shouldn't have to give up my desire for great sex, because of what someone else may think, or what society has programmed him to think. I don't know what else I want to say about this, it's just not fair I guess. Slowly but surely i hope this double standard gets changed, but you never know what can happen.

Down Low Brothas and the Sistahs that help them

There are an alarming number of young black men that feel that they have to hide their sexual orientation for fear of rejection by friends and family. In this day and age, many gay, lesbian, bi-sexual, and transgender people fear for their lives like many black people did during the Civil Rights times. To be perfectly clear, I have a strong disbelief that they are in the same category of hatred. Yes it’s up there with it, but it’s still far from the same. However to discern the difference would bring up to much debate. I would be more than happy to talk about it on a side note, but it’s not the aim of this post. This topic hits close to home for me, because of family and close friends that live this lifestyle so I apologize if I seem a little stern and not so light hearted as usual.
There are many stories, of men being on the “down low” and leading heterosexual lifestyles. Many of the “down low” men have a wife and multiple kids, but still sneak around with men or transgender people. I have to imagine that when it does come out, it’s a big shock of betrayal and deception to another level because of the trust and sanctity of marriage in most cases. It’s one thing to hide the fact that you’re gay, but it is another to enter into something as sacred as marriage with the intent of lying and premeditated act of cheating and adultery. Don’t take this the wrong way, I have no problem with LGBT, I have a problem with the lying and deception some use to appease the bias and underdeveloped standards of “normal” society. I can’t respect someone that would intentionally lie to their loved ones to escape the ignorance of certain people.
And on a side note there are some women who even in the midst of knowing their man is on the “down low”, stick by their man for fear of being alone. No deceptive relationship is worth holding onto. There are literally billions of people in the world, you will find someone that is true to you and willing to be there for you 100%. If you’re gay be gay, don’t trick the people that care about you. It’s not fair to anybody. I threw that link in for your entertainment.

I'm gonna leave this post fairly open-ended for the simple fact that this is something that can't be fixed with one voice, and one opinion, but as only a community can change.

Sexy vs. Skanky

Sexy: wearing a lacy slip under your dress to a nice dinner date with your man.

Skanky: Wearing the same lacy slip as your dress to a dinner date with your man.

Sexy: slow dancing with a guy at the club

Skanky: dry humping with a guy on the dance floor

Sexy: showing up to your boyfriends place wearing sexy lingerie under a trench coat.

Skanky: showing up at a guy you went on two dates place wearing nothing but the trench coat.

Sexy: Classic little black dress with heels

Skanky: A too little dress that doesn't cover your butt and clear heels

Sexy: watching your man play ball at the park

Skanky: flirting with your mans friends at the park

Sexy: Getting your hair and nails done.

Skanky: Getting your hair to match your nails.

Sexy: Playing hard to get with a guy you're interested in.

Skanky: Being a total bitch to the guy you're interested in.

Sexy: Meeting up with a new guy for a lunch date.

Skanky: Meeting up with a new guy so you can hook up.

Sexy: Passionate love

Skanky: Passionate lust

Sexy: cooking a romantic candlelit dinner

Skanky: ordering dinner and claiming you cooked it.

Sexy: sending sweet texts saying "I love you"

Skanky: sending pictures of your privates

Sexy: Mini vacation to Cancun

Skanky: Mini vacation to Cancun during spring break.

Where Are the Passionate People?

I'm going to start a roll call for all the men that love passionately, in and out of the bedroom.

-The men that can make your day special just having them smile at you.

-The men that work hard every day to make a better life for himself, his family, and community.

-The men who listen to you because you want to be heard.

-The men that don't settle for easy and work for the true treasures.

-The men that don't cheat, because they know the woman at home would be devastated if he did.

-The men that know how to treat a woman's needs in the bedroom, not focused on getting his nut, but so that she's satisfied as well.

-The men that hustle the blue and white collar world instead of the streets.

-The men that can cook too.

Because I'm not biased and I believe in the values as well, where are the passionate women?

-The women that have a full-time job to bring support to their man.

-The women who are strong enough to be with a man and not for a man.

-The women who allow their men to be men, and not nag them to death with petty nonsense.

-The women who hustle their mind and not their bodies.

-The women that don't settle for less because Mr. Right hasn't shown up yet.

-The women who aren't gold-digging hussies out to get a quick payoff so they don't have to work.

-The women who enrich lives of the people around them instead of being a negative role-model in their community.

-The women who make a house a home with their love and care.

I am looking to find real people that can showcase at least some of if not all of these qualities. It seems as though people now-a-days have no sense of what is healthy and civil for people to act when it comes to relationships and community. So many people pretend to portray these attributes and lead those who are true to them down a path of wasted time and deceitful intentions. Sex, love and relationships can bring about many wonderful experiences, but can also bring on pain worse than anything you could ever physically feel. Don't mind me and my ramblings; it's just something that's been on my mind. So keep sending me those questions and until the next question rolls my way much love and happiness...enjoy your night.

Phone Sex: Is it Taboo?

Phone sex started out as very taboo as most things do, and yet over time has evolved into something much bigger. Basic sexy phone conversations being something you do at night when you’re in the bed has evolved to talking dirty thru text messages any time of day. I have been in meetings, class, and in line at the bank having sex-text conversations. It’s convenient and very sexy especially when u get home to find your partner there and ready to go. Foreplay, with evolving technology is being taken to a different level. In this new age, with cell phones making people so available, it’s very easy for people to have less contact and still get just as much sex if not more to keep the intimacy alive in a relationship. There are so many options, with camera phones, text messages, verbal communication, and videos. It can go from cute little messages left for you all the way to sexy strip tease videos to show them what they will get later that night. But with all this digital intimacy, is the flair of actual bedroom pillow talk fading and becoming a thing of the past?
It has always been something that is just done and not talked about, making it taboo, but I’ve noticed with some of my friends and me especially, that we are becoming more open about it, because you can do it any time of day anywhere you get service.
As I was getting advice about this from my friends, we seemed to all say there can be many pros and cons. With phone sex, you can use your imagination and let it run wild. It can go from so sweet sincere and romantic to some of the raunchiest, kinky stuff you never thought you would do or say. It gives you the chance to let your inhibitions flow away and just be open. The biggest downfall is the lack of follow thru. You can say all these things, you can use your imagination, you can be wild, but if that’s not your personality, if that’s not how you feel or can physically let go in the bedroom, even all this digital foreplay, it can be anti-climactic, and in all honesty a let-down. I also noticed that in some cases it can begin to replace the intimacy, which when it does, you need to take a step back and re-examine the relationship. If you don’t have time for each other, why are you still together? You can only do so much phone sex, before it gets repetitive and predictable. If that’s all the intimacy you share people tend to wonder and be unfaithful. Phone sex should be something fun and exciting, a little different from the norm, not the routine.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE guys don’t let this be you
Girl: Baby I want to feel your long shaft slowly penetrating deep inside my pussy lips as I nibble on your ear lobe and feel your breathing and my breathing sync into one.
Guy: Yeah girl I want to fuck you hard.
THIS IS NOT OKAY WITH ANYONE. It will end the conversation really quick and you will feel very stupid once you decide to use your head and think about what you should have said. Take time and use your head, be creative and sexy. So keep sending me those questions and until the next question rolls my way much love and happiness...enjoy your night

Sex with the ex: The Relationship Saga Continues Pt. 2

Let’s take a stroll down memory lane and re-visit a topic, sex with an ex. Last time we talked about this, it was a “good” story. We got to experience one of the good times when sex with an ex can be fun. Now let me tell you a little story about when it can turn sour and people can get hurt…BADLY.

I was dating this guy for about 6 months, and we were friends for two years before that. I actually had the biggest crush on him long before we started to be good friends, so from the jump I was more into him than he was to me. Looking at it from the outside, it was doomed to begin with. We were lovey dovey; we even got to the point where we said I love you. So it was hard for me to let go, when he said it was too much commitment. I mean he was the one that said I love you first. I was mad, upset, bitter, angry, sad, lonely, basically every sad emotion I could be when it came to no longer being with him. Once that subsided and I could be in the same room with him without crying or wanting to kick him in the nuts, we started to talk. We began to become friends again, and had laughs and good times together. Then the infamous KISS happened and all the emotions I ever felt for him good and bad came flowing back at once. I was happy, because I was naïve to the fact that he didn’t want to be with me again, he just wanted to get laid. I was hopelessly in love with this guy who didn’t understand the emotional state I was in with him. He gave me hope when there was none so I gave him pussy, because I thought at that time it would bring us closer. So I continually got wrapped into the physical, I was getting laid, he was getting laid, but my emotions for him were getting suppressed. One day it was too much for me to handle. I had reached my breaking point and when I reached max capacity for suppressed emotion, I went into a deep depression. I wasn’t going to class, I wasn’t eating, and I wasn’t hanging out with any of my friends. I laid in my bed crying for weeks because I let him break my heart twice. I gave him control with my heart but didn’t tell him he had it. He was playing the game without knowing the rules. It took me over a year to move on and get my relationships back to normality. Now I feel bad for the guys I dated right after him, because I gave them my bitterness and anger towards men, which isn’t fair to anyone.

This here is the bad, and when I say it can get even worse please stay tuned for the next installment when it gets ugly. So keep sending me those questions and until the next question rolls my way much love and happiness...enjoy your night

Get it, Get it now....

The average young adult in America has had sex. And how could they have not with the new norm of today’s society is that most young people, around the age of 14 and 15, are losing their virginities, because their friend did, that’s what they saw on TV, or their favorite music artist is talking about it, when not too long ago the norm was saving yourself for marriage. Even with all this change in society’s norms, there are a few people in college who still hold true and abstain from having pre-marital sex. A few of my friends in particular, have shared with me that when the topic turns to sex that sometimes they get uncomfortable, because they feel as though we are pressuring them into something without actually saying something. Most of them have said that the teasing gets old, but don’t want to give into this kind of peer pressure. Which is reasonable, who wants to say I lost my virginity because my friends wouldn’t stop teasing me? So few people realize the effect their words have on others, which leads to self-esteem issues and other problems.

So to continue, when I was talking to one of my guy friends about him still being a virgin, he said it was way harder in high school to be a virgin than in College, but life for him was improving as he got older. I think that is mostly due to him having found friends that are more mature, and don’t focus on getting laid as much as getting an education or at least don’t show it. He also said he wasn’t necessarily waiting for marriage, just for a girl that was good to him, and wouldn’t break his heart. (See ladies it goes both ways so don’t be so mean). My other friend said something similar, she was ready, but doesn’t want to feel like a piece of ass afterwards, which I totally get, nobody wants to feel like that. While at the same time, a lot of my guy friends say they don’t want to experience a virgin for the fear that they get attached as many first timers do, which is a topic for another day.

As you can tell I am very passionate when it comes to me having sex, I mean hello my whole blog, but it concerns me when my younger cousins who are 14, 16, and 18 are in the influential age group that are having sex. I’m more-so concerned for the young ones that are in high school, because high school students peer pressure about sex more than any other age group. I hope by the time you get to this point that you don’t think I’m condoning pre-marital sex in any shape form or fashion. If you are ready, go with your gut, and don’t let anyone influence you. To give my little two cents, as far as age goes, if you can’t support yourself at 15 you can’t support a baby, so you shouldn’t be doing anything you’re not prepared to deal with for the long run. It’s always okay to say no, and that goes for men and woman.

So keep sending me those questions and until the next question rolls my way much love and happiness...enjoy your night

Sex with an ex....The relationship saga continues...

When it comes to sex with an ex, my theory is you can’t spell sex without an ex, so you might as well go with it for now. I feel like there should be certain rules you must follow, if you go there with an ex. Please keep in mind these are the reflections of my personal beliefs on what should be done. This has been compiled from a variety of sources mainly my friends.
1)Don’t go there if it was a bad break up. It is only going to make the more hurt party feel like there is hope when there is none. If u decide to do it anyway there is no way to avoid at least one person hurt more than they were before.
2)Don’t go there if neither of you have really had a chance to move on. Too soon after a break up can once again give hope to at least one or both parties. If you have had the chance to move on and you are both comfortable with each other and there is no bad blood between you go for it if it feels right.
3)Don’t go there if either of you have a current significant other. That’s just asking for trouble.
4)Don’t go there if the sex was never great in the first place. If it wasn’t great why go back to it and bring up other emotions and feelings.
5)Don’t hook up with an ex when you’re intoxicated. It leads to absolutely nothing but regrets in the morning, and possibly even more hurt feelings.
As you can tell there are a lot of don’t in my book when it comes to this topic. This is because I have had many a friend and many an experience where it can go badly. But it’s my favorite time STORY TIME!!!
I have to say one of the funniest times where sex with an ex is involved, is when I was dating this guy for about 3 months or so, and we just weren’t sparking. The physical attraction was there, just no real emotional connection. We decided we would be better suited at being friends instead of bf/gf. (As you notice nice clean break up) a few weeks past, I haven’t been laid in a while, so I’m starting to feel a little bit of pleasure withdrawal if you will. Now mind you my ex and I are still good friends, so I know he’s not dating anyone yet. So he comes over to my apartment, and we are watching a movie on my computer. I feel that it is a universal thing that if you invite someone over to “watch a movie” it means I want to get busy. With the luck that I have, my ex is the only person in the world that doesn’t get this, so we literally watch a movie. On a scale of 1-disappointed, I was pretty freaking disappointed. So clearly with him a subtle hint is not going to work. So I wait about a week to invite him over to my place, and since subtle hints don’t work, I opened the door with black lacy boy shorts and matching bra on along with a red corset because that was his favorite color. He was completely floored and rushed in and ravished my body right there on my kitchen counter. We eventually made it to the bedroom, and it had to be some of the best no strings attached sex I have ever had. Sex with your ex is supposed to be no strings attached, but more often than not, there’s going to be strings because there is a brief or long history. It all comes down to the couple’s dynamic. This was an example of the good....The bad and the ugly to follow...

Age: Is it really just a number?

As you may know from looking at my profile, you will see that I am 21 years of age. Since I started dating at the young age of 14, I have dated from 15-46. Don’t look at the screen all crazy I was of legal age when I dated someone 46yrs old; I was 19 to be exact. But with that said, if you are emotionally invested in a relationship, does age really matter? Now mind you when I was 19 I wasn’t interested in a man that was 46 for his good looks and star appeal, he bought me nice things and treated me well. I never once asked for a thing from him, he just happened to always know what I wanted and when I wanted it. Some people would say I was a gold digger or his sugar baby, but I feel like he was just a nice man that treated me well and looked out for me. I never once slept with him, though I’m sure he would not have turned me down, our relationship was never physical. I had some of the best dates I ever experienced with him. He took me to nice restaurants to wine and dine me, he took me on cruises to get away from the stress of my college life, and he bought me all the latest fashions to keep my girlfriends jealous. He is what every woman dreams of as a little girl, that they hope to find when they get older. The only problem was that I wasn’t grown up yet and he already lived the life I dreamed of having. It was fun while it lasted, but it wasn’t meant to be from the jump. He wanted an arm piece and I wanted to have fun and not get hurt like so many men before him had done to me.

So to get back to what my original question, is age really just a number? In my experiences it has been. If you know someone that has had a difference experience, let me know. Every man that I have dated, slept with, or known personally has never acted their age. I have grown up with some fellas that as we age forward their maturity grows backward. So until some man changes my mind, I will always believe that no matter how far in age you are from a man, it doesn’t really matter, because he doesn’t act his age anyway. I’m guessing that it never really changes, you just need to find someone that is at your same age level.

A Man in Uniform...

What is it about a man in uniform that is just so appealing? I can’t quite put my finger on it, but as I was standing in line at a local Starbucks, I found myself strongly attracted to the police officer standing in front of me. Now mind you had he been in “civilian” clothes, I probably would not have given him a second look, but the gun he had and the strong presence he brought by just standing there got me thinking dirty thoughts. All I can is that I wanted to jump the bones of the hot police officer right then and there in the middle of Starbucks with no inhibition in sight. Well some in sight, because let’s be realistic it’s a police officer in a Starbucks, let’s not get too crazy.

I have noticed that this has happened on more than one occasion with me, where there has been a decent looking guy, but put him in a police uniform, paramedic uniform, fire fighter uniform, well you get the point, and it makes him like 4 times hotter than he is. I know with the uniforms I listed before there may have been a recurring theme of men that saves lives. It’s not the case, I promise you, because I like the UPS guys to, but I think that may be the shorts they wear. I hope this attraction to men in uniforms subsides soon, because I can’t go around getting wet every time I see a hot man in uniform. That would be all bad. So what I have decided is that I will make my list and maybe check it twice of all the men, and what uniform they have that I wish to sleep with. I have police officer, marine, navy man, and army man under my belt. What other ones shall I conquer? And who will be next? I got a feeling it will be this hot paramedic that lives down the street from me, we recently met and I think I kind of like him. Oh the adventures of my life, where will you take me next???
So keep sending me those questions and until the next question rolls my way much love and happiness...enjoy your night

Story Time...

So there is this guy i know...(don't the best stories start out like that), but anyway there is this guy i know, I've know him for about 8 years now. He was Mr. Big Man on Campus in high school. The ladies loved him, the fellas wanted to be him, he had it all, and from what i know till this day still does. I was like many of those girls in high school fawning all over him, wanting to grab his attention, wanting to make him notice me. I gave up on the dream of making him my bf, and we grew to become good friends. It was only recently, that i found out that he wanted me as bad as I wanted him in high school. The only qualms I had were the fact that he had a girlfriend he basically called his wife. I'm not going to sit here and lie and say i didn't flirt with him anyway, he approached me, i had backed off. We would have the occasional flirty text going back and forth, and by flirty i totally mean hardcore sex text, but i tried to make it sound better. And then it would be that time of year when college students would go home for an extended period of time, and the texting would get more serious, like when am i going to see you when you get back? I really want to see you, can we make that happen? As intrigued as i am, I truly just can't bring myself to do it.
My friends and i love to go out to bars/clubs, so I know quite a few party promoters and a club owners. So an "ex" of mine who happens to be best friends of the above mentioned guy, decides it would be a good idea to invite me and my home girl to an event where he just happened to forget to mention "Mr. Big Man on Campus" would be. So needless to say I ran into him. Me being the smart lady that i am was totally prepared for anything. When he decided to walk up behind me, and grab my ass, i grabbed the nearest guy and full on made out with him. He was a pretty jealous and walked away. He comes up to me later mad at me like he has claim on me, hello you have a "wifey" why don't you go hang out with her and let me live my life. So I go on about my evening, and low and behold who's tap tap tapping on my shoulder, "Mr. Big", i'll shorten it and have it sound sex and the city, and now he wants to approach me in a manner a little more respectful. So he buys me any my friend a shot, and buys me a couple more shots *wink wink* so i'm feeling the music i'm feeling him. My friend, who i love to death, is the biggest cock block ever. She decides she's hungry and wants to leave a little early to go to Denny's. If only i drove, I wouldn't have left so early with this chick. But I digress, we go to Denny's and get there before the big rush of people. As we are leaving I get a text saying "U left already i wanted to hang out w/u after the club", mind you it's like 2:30 in the morning, there is nothing on his mind but one thing. So I tell him for tonight, and tonight only, I will hit you up when i get back home, and you can call me when you get to this side of town and you can come through.
He comes over, and we make out way to my room and mind you I have wanted this since high school, so has he, we are fooling around making out and he does something, that makes me let all my thoughts about what's wrong with this go. Please keep in mind i'm not a petite woman, i got some meat on my bones and then some. He picks me up throws me on the bed and eats my pussy like it's his last meal. I came once he kept going, I came twice he kept going, I cam three times....you get the idea. I lost count after a while to say the least it was the BEST oral I have ever had. I couldn't get up or even function properly. It was amazing!!!
It my turn to do my sexy thang, and i'm all into it, and here we are two sexy people, and he can't get hard from me sucking his dick. To add to that he says I was just so anxious and this actually happens with my girl. Why would you tell compare the girl you're cheating with to your girl. I'm not her for a reason, i have some thangs she doesn't she has some things i don't that's why we're here. I'm upset, but i try not to let it show, so we sit there talking for a while. It ends up being great conversation because we haven't talked in a while, like seriously talked not just sex texting. I realized why I liked him so many years ago, and I think I got a little attached. When I realized that, I know it was time to stop talking. I can't catch feelings for him, he has a wifey, and all the feelings of guilt that went out the window just flew back in. I feel horrible, and just want to get away, but then he starts kissing me again so I stop him. He starts to caress my thigh and slowly kiss my neck, I can't help but melt. When he nibbles on my ear lobe i get a shiver down my spine, a tingling sensation. Slowly but surely making his way to my lips. He tastes so sweet i want him so bad at this point, so i flip it. I lay him on the bed and slowly kiss down his well built abs and at this point he's already at full salute. I slowly start sucking the shaft, playing with the balls and all. He starts moaning letting me know it's good to him. When he finally cums, I keep going like he did to me. I slurp it up and make him hard again. I know its so sensitive, and then he starts shaking. He just stayed there for a bit not moving, but breathing heavily. I got mine and he got his.
We are still friends, we don't mess around anymore, which is good and now that this pent up lust is out of our system, we can be real friends(in a way). Learn from my mistake people, it will come back to you trust me. I would never want to be cheated on, and I let someone else use me as a pawn in their dirty dealings. It's not right, and I wish I could take it back, but I can't all i can do is tell the story of passion that brings a moral dilemma to light. Do as I say and not as I do. So keep sending me those questions and until the next question rolls my way much love and happiness...enjoy your night

Is it bad when...

Is it bad when you sleep with someone, but then the next night you sleep with their best friend?

Is it bad when you know you shouldn't like someone and you do?

Is it bad when you make stuff up to sound more interesting?

Is it bad when you know you shouldn't but you do anyway?


These are all questions i have received recently, I was quite intrigued and a little shocked. (I have changed the actual questions a little to better suit the blog. content same, wording different.) i can and will answer them....


Is it bad when you sleep with someone, but then the next night you sleep with their best friend?

I really wanna say that it's bad, but who am i to cast the first stone, when i have been in that situation. It sucks to be that person, but if you don't feel bad, then who is anyone to say right or wrong. Just make sure you are being safe, use protection and always have an up to date STD test. Don't be stupid with sex, use your head.

Is it bad when you know you shouldn't like someone and you do?

No, it happens to the best of us. You fall for that bad guy or girl, that you know you shouldn't like, but you can't help it they have something that obviously intrigues you. I say let it pass, try not to act on it, cause it will only cause problems.

Is it bad when you make stuff up to sound more interesting?

Yes tell tales, lying, fibbing all that jazz is bad news. If you're not interesting, do something with your life to be able to tell true stories. Tell lies gets you nowhere fast.

Is it bad when you know you shouldn't sleep with someone but you do anyway?

I guess for me it would depend on who you sleep with, and why you shouldn't be sleeping with them. I would say its definitely bad if you have been down that path before and it only ends in heartbreak. Trust me nobody asks for that. If you are feeling guilt about either your or their relationship outside of the obvious sexual one between the two of you, there is probably a big issue you need to work out. If you feel guilty about it, it's probably a bad thing.

There is no right or wrong answer to any of these questions. I have given you my perspective, take from it what you will. If you disagree I respect your opinion, however it is your opinion not mine. I take all questions very seriously, so don't be shy ask away. So until the next question rolls my way much love and happiness...enjoy your night

Big kids play with toys too....

So i'm obviously no stranger to the local sex shops, but i wanted to talk about something that i think is fun and a joy to have in my life, and that would be my favorite toy. I feel like the greatest invention for women in this area is the jack rabbit, and it comes in many shapes, sizes, colors and speeds. I mean don't get me wrong I have an assortment, of toys from dildos, pocket rockets, and g-spot vibes, but nothing and i mean nothing compares to the jack rabbit vibrator. i may be getting to comfortable with it, but it's not like any man has been able to get me close in a long time. I've begun to organize and throw passion parties which for me and my girls has been good. They get to ask questions and i get to learn about the differences women have when it comes to achieving orgasm. BOOOOOYYYYY let me tell you fellas ya'll need to step ya game up cause the toy biz sure has. I don't know if me and my girls are dipping from the same learning pool, but guys just don't seem to get the formula right. Either they cum to quickly and don't get them off or take forever, and aren't really working it like they should. Any who, back to the main topic, if you're interested in a quick get ya mind right type orgasm we came to a general agreement that most pocket rockets will get the job done. What i love about the pocket rocket is that it comes in so many varieties, that you can make it fit your personality. If people know you're allergic to chocolate, and they see you with a "betterfinger" pocket vibe, they are gonna be suspicious right?

My personal beef with dildos is that I am doing to much work to get off. I mean if i am really just trying to enjoy myself and relax, why would i want to do all the work? IT MAKES NO SENSE TO ME. Anyway, they do at least offer many different colors, sizes, shapes, and textures. They all look pretty cool, but unless you know your body and can easily cum from vaginal stimulation, i would not invest in them.

G-spot vibes look kind of funky but they get the job done. I have personally experienced them, i feel like other things work better, weather it be my fingers, or another toy. They on the other hand had many positive things to say about it. One of the main things is that it could find the g-spot unlike many of the men they had been with.

Whatver you're looking for in a vibrator, make sure it works for you, not what your friend recommends cause it's usually what works for her. And always remember if all else fails, use ur fingers, or get the real thing. Please continue to send in questions i know i haven't written as often, but i am finding more time to get it done, so untill the next question rolls my way much love and happiness...enjoy your night

What's good ma?

Is this supposed to be the new pick up line of the 21st century, because if it is i'll gladly stay single. I don't want any man that thinks its okay to call me ma or mami, mainly because i'm not ya mother. I don't want a man that will call me sugar, honey or babygirl, because i'm not ya daughter. If one more man calls me Shortii we are going to have issues. Yes Plies revived it with his song Shawty and The Dream with Shawty is a 10, but that does not make it okay to call every girl you are trying to "holla at" or your girlfriend Shawty. I hate sounding bitter and angry, but this is an issue that has been on my mind for a while. When i'm in the streets or even on myspace, i can't go a day without being called ma, mami, shortii, babygirl, or hon. This is an epidemic that needs to be stopped, and if it doesn't, well i guess i'll be single till a man can step to me correctly.
Enough of this bitter angry woman stuff, and on a side note, Ms. Nikky has moved back home to the fast life of LA and i am utterly excited. Maybe this time i will get a chance to write more about my experiences since i will be going out just about every night i can. Hawaii has been fun, but goodbye aloha state, and hello fun state. Don't worry Hawaii we can always be friends.
Please continue to send in questions i know i haven't written as often, but i am finding more time to get it done, so untill the next question rolls my way Much love and happiness...enjoy your night

Big Mind...Small Mind....

So i've been meaning to talk about this one for a while. There's this guy, and i'm really feeling him. I like his style, his swag if you will. I am beginning to be smitten with him, and if you know me, i want to know what he's like, and if you don't know me that means i hope he knows how to fuck. (excuse my language) So he comes over to my place, and we hang out, we're talking and laughing (you know the whole we're getting to know each other thing), and then next thing you know i'm laughing he's laughing and decides he's gonna kiss me. I'm sitting there suprised, but not pulling away it was good to me, so i go with it. Things are starting to get hot and heavy, so i'm still going with it. This guy, to my surprise, was huge. I was totally into it and was like it's gonna be amazing, he's sexy, he's kissing me right, this is going to happen and its going to be mind-blowing and extremely satisfying. BOOOOOOOYYYYYYY was i wrong. Maybe its me, but i'm pretty sure its not. I suck it up with the best of them, and I had this guy toe-curling saying my name it was so good to him. If I have time to think about what i'm gonna do after work in three days that is not okay with me. Pump, pump, pump away sweetie, but if you got 8 inches, and can't work it, you don't deserve it. I was lonely in disappointment city, and wanted to just say ya know what it's okay you can stop. I didn't want to be mean, so i tried to change positions....Let's just say it was better, but not great. I was mostly disappoited because i really liked the guy.

I decided it would be wrong this time to just write him off, so i decieded i'll give him another chance, it was our first time, i'll give him the benefit of the doubt. So we take a break from that, and focus on building our relationship. We deciede there is no nervous pressure, we are comfortable with each other, let's try this again. (GOOD COMMUNICATION MAKES A BETTER RELATIONSHIP). So we are getting hot and heavy just like before, and he is putting in work. I am feeling great, back arching, heavy breathing, moans and screams, i'm about to have an explosive orgasm, and he cums. If only you could see my level of pisstivity (yes I made up my own word for it). SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO close, yet let down again, and then had the audacity to ask me if I got off. Do I look satisfied right now?

I will take this as a learning experience and write this one off. I mean the communication was there, the chemistry was there, the passion was there, but we could not make it happen. You live you learn you get a vibrator to fill the gaps. Since this happened a while ago, I have since this time had better sex, so i know it wasn't me, and truly know we were not meant to have an intimate relation. Please continue to send in questions i know i haven't written in a while, but i am finding more time to get it done, so untill the next question rolls my way Much love and happiness...enjoy your night

Sex and Video Games

In the evolution of video games, I have seen many more sexual undertones in the competitive aggression displayed with games that involve distinguishing female and male characters. What I'm noticing is that since it's so many young males playing the video games, the female characters are skinnier, sexier and a lot more provocative. I'm not a skinny mini, and i just think it sucks that this is the imagery that is being placed in the young developmental minds of our youth. I'm not like huge or anything, I got my curves in all the right places, i'm just not a size 2. I'm not gonna get all political with this post, it's just something i've been thinking about, when I see games like grand theft auto, mortal kombat vs. DC, tomb raider, and dead or alive. Games are games as many people would say, but a lot of strategy and thought can go into them. I love video games don't get me wrong hanging with the boys playing madden and call of duty is the time of my life, but the only chicks you see are these hot ass skinny minis that are so unrealistic, and make guys drool like crazy. I want to see a plus size bombshell that isn't portrayed as a beast, but something sexy and desired. Is that too much to ask?
Anywho... I guess untill that day comes, i'll just stick to playing racing games that are just fun and old school games to make me re-live my childhood.

WHERE IS THE DIVA???

I apologize to my faithful reader(s)...*cough cough* hahaha that I have not been posting to my blog like i should be. I have been crazy busy and haven't gotten any real feedback for new questions and topics so i have kind of been slacking. I am back in the blog world and ready to write some more. I have some good topics coming up: sex and video games, the phenomena of the rabbit, and many more topics just to give you a little tease. Please believe ya gurl is not AWOL, and I am ready to get back to what I like to do well the second thing I like to do. * wink wink* much love to you and yours and please enjoy your night.